McHospital

"Fast-food places have them. Banks and pharmacies do, too. Now hospitals are opening drive-thrus and drive-up tent clinics to screen and treat a swelling tide of swine flu patients."

This reminds me of Children of Men somehow. Apocalyptic-ish. Hmm... Should I be more scared?

No More Somersaults!

Its ridiculously easy to make my bed now that I can't actually MOVE once I'm lying down. The comforter stays perfectly creased and connected to the sheet. Who knew? If I create the habit now, maybe I'll be able to keep it once I heal and go back to somersaulting through the night.

When Recovering From Abdominal Surgery...

1. Sneezing is more terrifying than coughing, but only a little so.

2. Tylenol PM is fertilizer for fantastical dreaming.

3. It is nearly impossible not to pick something up after dropping it. Psychologically. I have so much empathy for naughty old people who know better than to bend down to pick something up, but do it anyway.

4. Having a clean bedroom, a clean kitchen, a clean bathroom, and a clean living room are suddenly of infinite importance. Even if it means 10 more minutes of standing, and complicated pain, those dishes will be washed gahdamit!

5. Flossing becomes less of a chore. Cause you can do it (unlike most other tasks).

6. Your mother, the caretaker, is seen through rose-colored glasses and you promise yourself never to disappoint her or talk back again.

7. Raspberry Jello, Tapioca Pudding, Chicken Noodle Soup, Cinnamon Sugar Toast, Cornflakes, Carrot Juice, & Coconut Ice Cream are delightful.

8. Fluffy slippers are imperative.

9. Comedies should be avoided. Especially The Office. Laughter is the opposite of medicine.

my surgeon rocks. im feeling on my way to great. how is such brilliance possible?

Ohio Preschool Teaches Cantonese

I began my first research paper of the semester this week. After a frenzy of EBSCO Hosting (i.e. GWU library's online journal database searching), I came up with 26 relevant articles about teaching young children to be internationally minded and skilled in ways that will be marketable in today's global community.

www.asiasociety.org

is a flagship of what I'm looking for. But ultimately the research paper needs to be comparative... so that means comparing/contrasting multicultural education and school internationalization. Which turn out to be two very different approaches. Guess why?!

To Be Continued...

Injury to Insult

It's so much easier to copy & paste what I'm reading or loving at the moment than... write something original. Lazy blogger, am I. I blame it on Ziggy, my orange-sized cyst that makes me tired and content to just be. He will be gone next Friday, though. Dug out by Dr. Jon. And then I will need a new excuse to be a lazy blogger.

"Eff you, lazy blogger!" It sounds like a British insult.

"A Question"

A voice said, Look me in the stars
And tell me truly, men of earth,
If all the soul-and-body scars
Were not too much to pay for birth.

-Robert Frost

To Fall in Love You Gotta Trip

"The first movement of the spiritual life is not to serve or worship or join a bible study, but to be found, to be loved. And learning to live out of that deep core of acceptance and affirmation is the only way to walk with God and offer a gift of love in return. A gift of grateful response and connection. The gift of us." - Kevin Doi

"The question of gluttony is a question of marriage. What am I united to? What will I give everything for?" - Jeff Cook

I'm a Roman Candle

$1.50

"Given the great inequalities it yields, I believe that someday our market system of wage labor will be considered as illegitimate as slavery is now considered. The fact that the market pays someone $1.50 for a day of backbreaking labor while others get millions of dollars for their white collar labor is akin to a form of slavery for which no one takes responsibility and which is disguised by the rhetoric of freedom."

-Steven J. Klees

Things I Tell Myself

Those two cockroaches I found in my bed were the only two to ever set foot in my bedroom. Cockroaches are not like ants- where there is one there are a multitude. Besides, I smashed them. So they're gone. And I wear earplugs to bed so nothing can crawl inside my ears and nest. And if an insect crawled in my mouth, it would just be added protein. A compulsory midnight snack. It doesn't matter anyway, though, because I killed the only two roaches that have ever been in my bed.

I Wish You Still Made Me Sick

I loathe Pink. I find her obnoxious and whiney. Whatever happened to the Pink who admitted "You Make Me Sick"? She was kick-ass. Now she's just. Kicked. Her new songs make me want to slap her and screech, "Get Over Yourself and try helping abused puppies or something. C'est more to life than your self-loathing. Girl Scouts Honor." I'm such a h8r.

My Overzealous Ovary

My ovary got mad that I wouldn't let her use her special talent. So she tried to make a baby on her own. But it's not a real baby. It's just a mass. Hopefully she isn't too mad when I abort the mass. Instead she'd better realize this way of acting up is completely inappropriate and could get both of us killed if she isn't careful.

It reminds me of my ancient fear of being Satan's version of the Virgin Mary. I was so afraid I'd one day be totally pregnant w/ the antichrist and have no way of explaining it to my family. This time, I was more afraid that I'd accidentally gotten too friendly with a fertilized toilet seat. (Seat covers are for babies.) But no. Just home to a mass made by an overly ambitious ovary.

So now I wait. Why is it that a doctor who specializes in urgent surgical patients only works on Wednesdays? Who only works on Wednesdays? Seriously?

Clap On, Clap Off!

I want to log into Facebook right now. It always seem(s/ed) to be a nice thing to do before turning off the lights and saying "See ya later" to the world at large. But it rarely was. There was always one more face to click on, comment to make, link to follow. It was a terrible 30-minute way to end the night.

But I have no routine to replace it with. So now I stare at my links at the top of my browser with a blank blah-ness. Until I can bring myself to say, "Screw it," and turn off the lights lacking any feelings of closure.

This is an attempt at closure. Sigh.

Clap Off.

P.S. If only I could replace all my BAD habits with GOOD habits instead of... well, NO habits, then I would be a supremely spectacular specimen!

What else have I done in my sleep...

It totally creeps me up when I wake up, and my cell phone (which functions as my alarm) is on the floor instead of on the dresser across my bedroom. And 30 minutes have passed since it sounded at 1 pm, transitioning into the snooze cycle. And I have no memory whatsoever of waking up, walking across the room and throwing it on the floor like a two year old.